It's a bit hard to write about what I've been doing during these times. It's hard to put into words because it seems like I just need to take it day by day, and writing for me means remembering the past and imaging the future, no matter how positive or negative they may be.
During this time of covid isolation and distancing, I've gotten a few new tunes in my ear - mostly from the various live online streaming concerts that many musicians are turning to in order to offset lost income.
They are waltz's, and even though rhythm is my weak spot, I still want to do them right.
When we were in the milder form of social distancing, I was feeling all right. But now, as the quarantine gets tighter and my excursions limited to taking short walks to get some air, I'm feeling a little tighter in the chest, a little closer in my mind to total shut in.
I haven't really had a true practice since the last times I was at CSI, my usual rehearsal space, on March 11. Ever since then, it's been a series of micropractices meant to keep up with skills, but none that are real exploratory practices.
Maybe I can explore why in this post? I think I needed room to experiment - to not feel too self conscious about taking time to polish a phrasing. Without worrying about how to wash my violin afterwards (ps don't wash violin wood parts with alcohol! it will destroy the varnish).
Bringing that sense of safety back into my life will go very far in bringing back my practice.
So for now, I'm practicing the isolation waltz's - Josefin's Waltz, Westphalia Waltz, Dusty Wine Bottle, Nopeggios Waltz, Jennifer MacDonald's Waltz - in conjunction with my once-a-day excursions outdoors - where I route myself around people, try to avoid them as I walk around, just like I would do in a waltz.